The Library, The Garden, The Pond and The Train

In my work, I use a lot of figurative language to convey distinctions and ideas. I find that it’s a powerful tool for better understanding and navigating the complexities of life. They offer profound insights and perspectives that help us develop resilience, self-awareness, and deepen our understanding.

In this article, I’ll go over four figurative devices that I use with clients and in my own life: The Library, The Garden, The Pond, and The Train. Each one has a different context and purpose that helps bring illumination and peace of mind to areas that were once immense obstacles or blindspots.

The Library

The first metaphor I wish to touch upon is The Library. I created this for myself when I needed to let go of people, places and things in my life that were occupying too much space, rent free. It creates a way to organize memories and past experiences, enabling one to be fully in the present moment, while creating space to honor and appreciate all that has come to pass.

I related experiences in my life to a constant writing of my life story. Some of the events are trivial and small; these would fill sheets of paper, or perhaps pamphlets. Other experiences traverse years or decades and become tomes of encyclopedias. It was specifically the experience of ruminating obsessively over events, often that did not go the way that was planned, that would dominate and preoccupy my thought space. Sometimes, it was grief over the passing of a family member, sometimes it was the ending of a relationship or the completion of jobs. When these were layered, it became impossible to be in the present moment. The experience of literally carrying these with me weighed me down; furthermore, I only had so much space in my metaphorical hands and backpack to hold them.

To let go of this weight, I needed somewhere for these books. I found that “moving on” initially occurred as giving up, so I needed an empowered context and structure instead. That’s when I created a metaphorical library in a beautiful study. It is a place in my consciousness that holds all these experiences, where I can find comfort knowing I didn’t have to abandon or forget them. The library enables me to go and visit these experiences, these people, and these times. I can pull the book off the shelf and read the passages, then, most importantly, I must put it back on the shelf and go back to the day.

The Garden

The Garden serves as a metaphor for self-care and boundary-setting. I developed this device for myself around 2016, and I now use it with my clients who historically have no experience with creating boundaries. It's helpful when we are dealing with people we care about and love, but the relationship is creating harmful tension.

I imagine the garden initially as a space overrun with weeds, varmints, and crops that aren’t worth eating. The first thing I must do is put a fence around the garden. This enables me to stop anything else from coming in, so I can focus on pulling out the weeds, removing the animals, and tilling the soil. From here, I can fertilize the ground, choose what types of fruit trees I wish to plant, and allow the saplings to mature. Over time, I can put a gate in the fence, so others can come and visit, help with the garden, or enjoy the shade and the food. Perhaps eventually the garden is so robust that it outgrows the fence, and that can be taken down as well, for I now know how to exist in the abundant garden.

Through this metaphor, we learn the importance of what I call benevolent selfishness: cultivating and protecting our mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being. First, we allow for a season of introspection and growth. Then, once we feel comfortable, we can start opening up to others. Ultimately, this fosters an empowered sense of self by honoring our boundaries.

The Pond

I utilize the allegory of The Pond when I want to talk about the far-reaching effects we have on ourselves and others, even if we can’t see it. Like casting a pebble into still waters, our choices reverberate across the surface. The bigger the stone, the larger the initial waves. In the seemingly infinite pond, we don’t often see how far those waves reach.

It was important for me to create a powerful image in my mind to give me hope and solace in times where perhaps you aren’t receiving recognition for your efforts or when you are leading the charge on a new endeavor. The belief that one makes a difference, even when they can’t immediately see it, or perhaps will never see it, still doesn’t detract from the importance of doing it.

With the allegory of The Pond, we confront the often-hidden ripple effect of our actions. It underscores the interconnectedness of all beings and the significance of our individual contributions to greater meanings. It’s easy to become frustrated when we can't see immediate results from what we do. But by embracing humility and responsibility, we can recognize the profound impact we wield and the enduring legacy we leave behind, especially in moments of uncertainty or obscurity.

The Train

Lastly is the metaphor of The Train. While I didn’t create this one, I found it to be a very fascinating way of relating to one's life in gratitude, rather than regret, defeat or self-pity.

Envision life as a boundless journey aboard a train. Throughout your journey on this train, passengers will board and exit. Some of these people will join you for conversations and tea, while others will be your companion and share quarters. Some may get off on one stop, and board at another down the line. Some you'll remember, and some you won’t. Each station brings with it new beginnings, new endings. You don’t know where your ticket goes, just that you had one when you boarded. And ultimately, you won’t know when to get off till the conductor tells you, just as no one else on the train knows when they leave as well.

This metaphor can perhaps help us embrace the fluidity of existence, appreciating the temporary nature of relationships and experiences. As we traverse the tracks of time, relinquishing attachments to outcomes may allow us to find peace in the present moment and gratitude for the lessons learned along the way. To recognize the rhythm of change and impermanence means embarking on a lifelong voyage of self-discovery and acceptance.

Each of these provide ways of being appreciative of all the elements of life. It’s a manner to be empowered and to create chosen meaning that inspires and elevates. They were designed to offer profound insights into the human experience, revealing truths that transcend the confines of language and logic. Through the metaphors of The Library, The Garden, The Pond, and The Train, we can discover reservoirs of wisdom and resilience within ourselves, empowering us to navigate life with grace and understanding. If you want to learn more about applying these metaphors to your own journey, schedule some time with me here.